How to correct your child and at the same time improve your relationship with them
Do you sometimes feel that your children are doing everything wrong? That you have to correct them almost every minute, make comments, or even scold them? That you have to repeat the same thing over and over again, but again they are still doing everything wrong? Do you have to expend an enormous amount of energy and nerves?
And you’re absolutely right! Children really do everything wrong. And to control them really requires a lot of energy.
But the constant control in the little things does much more harm than good. The more often you correct your child, the less he/she listens to them. And when they merge into an almost continuous stream, they simply go in one ear and out the other. So in order for the child to react and understand something, you have to raise your voice more and more; again and again. Is it possible to build or maintain a trusting relationship with a child by constantly raising your voice? Hardly.
In addition, the reserves of attention and capability of responding to a child is limited. If he/she hears from you three dozen remarks during the day, he/she will not be able to respond to each of them. And, of course, he/she will not be able to understand which of them is more important than others.
Your task is to prioritize. Highlight the problems that are really important and solve them; and when they are resolved, take on your child’s less important mistakes and omissions.
Make a list of reasons for which you have to repeatedly make correct your child. Highlight the three to five that are most important to you. This is exactly what you should do first. And postpone the rest for a while.
Please, the next time you want to correct your child, pause for a few seconds beforehand. Lower your annoyance and make a decision whether this particular correction should be made to the child right now. And if necessary, kindly point out to the child what he/she did “wrong.”
And remember that one correction isn’t enough. You will need time because the solution to such a problem means forming a new habit. But as a result, the educational process will go much faster. And most importantly, the atmosphere in your family will improve!